I visualized the me I want to be. And I created it. Began to create it.
I never wanted a “him” to be my world again, a natural co-dependency and place of comfort I so easily fall into when in love. My default setting.
I realise the universe is giving me what I need. Not what I want.
I have been telling myself that, but not understanding it.
It’s given me someone who cannot be my world. Someone who will not allow himself to be my world. To teach me that there is a middle ground between loving myself and someone else.
I can see this now. How much healthier everyone would be if we are a beautiful part of eachothers life. A piece of each others joy.
I am strong and unstoppable. All I need to do is keep it that way.
I see myself becoming weak and vulnerable. I can’t let myself fall to my knees with devotion. I need to put ME first.
And all the rest will follow.
Original written: 31/08/2014 ~ old school pen on paper style